It’s been just over a year since I came across Sarah Wilson’s book I Quit Sugar For Life and wrote an enthusiastic blog post full of all my good intentions. I was so sick of feeling tired & rundown and being irritable & snappy. My eating habits were awful and I regularly binged on chocolate, biscuits & ice cream. I knew something had to change and when I read Sarah Wilson’s books a light bulb went off in my head…
I soon began to understand the physical effects of sugar and in particular the psychology of sugar addiction. The word chocoholic is often bandied about and used in a jokey manner but I was (and still am) a chocoholic in the truest sense of the word. I was constantly thinking about my next fix and sneaking biscuits whenever I went into the kitchen. I would get a couple of bars of chocolate from the local shop then head over the road to the post office & get a couple more, in the same way an alcoholic spreads their drinking out over a few pubs so that no one witnesses the full binge. The stupid thing is that I didn’t eat chocolate for about 9 months when I was breastfeeding Madeleine as it gave her reflux. It’s amazing what the thought of more sleep can do for your willpower! But as soon as she stopped taking the boob I was straight down the shop to clear the shelves of Dairy Milk.
Needless to say, I did not quit sugar overnight. In fact, I didn’t fully quit sugar at all. What I did do, after a couple of false starts, was dramatically cut down my sugar intake. No more cereal, fruit juice or yogurts. And I only very very occasionally had chocolate or a piece of cake, usually in social situations. You can read more about my low sugar eating habits here.
So where am I now? Well, I must confess. I am well and truly off the wagon. Last week I ate my own body weight in Dairy Milk & bourbons (they are mighty fine dunkers!). In fact I have been slipping into the sugary abyss for the last few months and in typical addict style I have a plethora of excuses, but it boils down to tiredness & lack of willpower.
As you know I had a rough pregnancy with Thomas and toward the end I was barely sleeping & in a lot of pain. My willpower began to wane and I started having the odd ‘treat’ as a pick-me-up here & there. The Other Half always has chocolate & biscuits in the house so temptation started to creep up on me but it was compounded when my in-laws, God love them, visited and brought a truck load of chocolate & biscuits. Peer pressure one, willpower nil.
Like I said though, all that is ultimately just an excuse. I could have said no but I didn’t and suddenly, somehow, I am back to where I started a year ago. I’m lethargic, bloated and very short tempered. I’m struggling to concentrate. My skin is spotty & blotchy. And all I can think about is where the next bit of sweetness is coming from. I need all the help I can get to deal with a 3 year old & a 2 month old so this self destructive, energy-sapping behaviour is ridiculous really. I’m so annoyed with myself!
But, enough is enough. Time to man up and climb aboard the sugar wagon once more. Today is day one of detox! Follow me on Facebook & Twitter for regular updates and I’ll report back here with more details next week. Any one going to join me? I could do with some virtual handholding if you’re up for it…